Dads Never Leave You

I dreamed of my Daddy last night. One of those vivid dreams where you can almost swear that you’re in their presence. I love those dreams because it gives me faith in the Universe that those we love never really leave you – they just change energy into something else. I try and reconcile my faith as a follower of Christ with this and the only thing I can say is that I can’t define “Asleep in Christ” and so I accept these gifts of connectivity with awe and wonder at what they mean, but I don’t delve too deeply because it’s just enough that I got to talk to my Daddy last night, even if it was a weird dream that my cousin shot me and he was sitting by my hospital bed. We talked of modern things and his wisdom was the same – leave the past behind, move forward and above all else Take Care of Business. His mantra. My goal for the day. A reminder to focus on the present and take care of what I have control over.

I talked to him a little more when I woke up and sat in the sunshine outside. It seems like a California day here in Texas. Low humidity, awesome sunshine and a little Santa Ana-like breeze. Just the kind of day he would have loved and I can picture him in his hammock, strong and tan with his dogs and his little farm around him. My heart is full of him today and it seems that all of nature is in agreement that I need his presence around me today. It’s been eight years since he died and today is the first day I’ve been at peace with our new relationship.

I think I will plant something today to honor him. He could grow anything, make anything, do anything. He was my Daddy. I know I was a well-loved child, and I know he was proud of me – and today, I know he still is, and is still around me, guiding me, leading me and showing me how to navigate life and love the same way he did when he could tell me all I needed to hear.

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